Parenthood

Rev. Andrew Gama

Learning to listen

by Rev. Andrew Gama

Juniors are at a point in their lives when they need someone who will listen to them. The maxim that children should be seen and not heard doesn’t go over very well with early adolescents. They want to be heard. They want to be taken seriously and of course, the best way to tame them seriously is to listen to what they have to say.

Listening has rightly been called the language of love, and in junior ministry it is also the key to a young persons heart. Take a young adolescent seriously by listening to him/her and that young adolescent will give you a great deal of power and authority over him or her.

Be careful here don’t interrupt that to mean that the purpose of listening is to control or dominate juniors. What it means is that when a junior is taken seriously, by an adult, then that young person is likely to give back to the adult the right to exercise power and authority over him. Put another way; if you will listen to a junior then they will listen to you.

An old bit of wisdom says that, there are two ways to open an egg. The first is to break it. The second is to warm it. The first is preferred if you want to eat the egg. The second is preferred if you want it to live. If you want your junior to live and grow, then we must warm them with our ears, by being good listeners. If we will listen to them, they will open themselves up to what we have to say. They will respect us and look good to us for leadership and guidance. Junior workers who want to have a significant impact on the lives of young people would be well advised to develop their listening skills.

When juniors describe a person they don’t like they often say he is a grouch. Juniors interpret grouchiness in adults as a personal dislike for them. But they are attracted to those adults who great them with a smile and who seem to possess a positive attitude and a warm sense of humour.

This doesn’t mean that you have to be a comedian to be an effective juniors worker. You don’t have to be like the stereotypical youth worker whose biggest asset is the ability to tell jokes and take a pie in the face. Junior ministry is a lot more than fun and games. What it means is that you’re mature enough to take yourself in the ministry seriously. You just need to be able to loosen up a bit.

I have met many junior workers who see themselves primarily as disciplinarians. Their job is to maintain law and order.

The problem with that attitude is that many discipline problems in juniors ministry are self inflicted by junior workers who are essentially negative and humour less.

(To be continued)
 

[ Back ] [ Up ] [ Next ]

[ Home ]

Copyright © 2001 -  2006  Arusha Times.  E-mail: arushatimes@habari.co.tz