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Issue 00407 |
Feb 1 - 24, 2006 |
issn 0856 - 9135 |
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Dark Side |
 An
encounter with 'Doctor Dawa' .... or somebody!By Valentine Marc Nkwame Next time you fall sick, don't bother with going to hospital. Instead, just head straight to the nearest bar or pub, because this is where you are likely to find a Doctor who prefer to be called Dr. Dawa. Now the word 'Dawa' is a Swahili term which means medicine, and sure enough, Dr. Dawa claims to have practically every type of medicine for all kinds of ailments. By the way, don't expect Dr. Dawa to be adorned with those white robes usually worn by physicians and maybe also be spotting a stethoscope around his neck, right? Well, wrong! The guy dresses in ordinary shirt and trousers outfit, but instead of wearing a stethoscope round his neck, he wears a chain of kitchen wares round his shoulders. The cutlery that Dr. Dawa usually carry round his shoulders, in his daily quests around local pubs or drinking joints after dusk, include; Kitchen knives, forks, spoons, meat board, carrot graters, fly-whisks, fruit choppers and egg wipers. In case you are wondering what exactly do all these equipments have to do with a doctor, then it is important to know that, this kind of a doctor also doubles as a hawker and those kitchen wares he usually carry around are actually 'For sale!' Apparently, that is what he does for a living; going round peddling practically everything, from kitchen utensils, to assorted Male under-pants and of late (due to ongoing power rationing) the doctor has also been selling, rechargeable lanterns, dry cells and portable torches. The doctor is also a good businessman who loves his customers to fault. You can always get an 80 percent discount from each of the marked prices on his various pieces of merchandise. So, how comes the local 'physician' is busy peddling artifacts in bars instead of being in his consultancy room, practicing medicine? According to Doctor Dawa, the medical field isn't exactly paying, especially because in reality, he is a traditional doctor, specializing in herbal treatment. Now, few people trust traditional doctors, especially those who go round local pubs, selling male underwear. My first encounter with doctor Dawa, was during the time when I was suffering from toothache and wasn't exactly feeling like consulting a dentist, at least, not the ones currently practicing in Arusha. Fortunately, Dr. Dawa happened to have just the right potion of medicine that was 'guaranteed' to cure my ailments and stop the pain for good. "I will bring it tomorrow," promised Dr. Dawa. As it happens, the doctor never carries his medicine with him. True to his words, the doctor brought the alleged cure on the following day. "You mix this with boiled water and gaggle the liquid in your mouth for 30 minutes, then spit it in a large bowl." Dr. Dawa prescribed. Somehow his prescription sounded weird, for instance, why do I have to spit the mixture in a bowl? "So that you can get to see the germs that have been causing pain in your teeth." My academic knowledge of Biology may be limited but surely microorganisms such as germs are supposed to be invisible to the naked eyes. "Well, you will see them this time," assured the Doc. "They will of course be very tiny, but they can be seen, the germs will be floating in the large bowl." He then handed me the rather dirty package, containing black powder. Dr. Dawa boasted that, after the 'medication' my teeth will never hurt again or become loose, why, I could even chew; rocks, iron, lead and steel with them. The powder somehow failed to dissolve in the boiled water, but I drank the mixture all the same. Once in the mouth it tested like grinded charcoal and as soon as I spit it out half an hour later, it indeed turned out to be charcoal powder. The 'germs' were nowhere in sight, but I assumed that the treatment was so effective such that the microbes fled away. The toothache however continued, this time topped with the newly introduced jaw ache, acquired from the strain of keeping an uncanny mixture of charcoal powder and boiled water in my mouth, for about 2000 seconds. The following morning I reported to the nearest dentist, who pulled out the annoying tooth in just two seconds, gave me some pills and .... Hey presto! The pain was gone. That evening I met with Dr. Dawa, he seemed very excited and asked me how effective his potion was. I didn't beat around the bush, I told him point blank that his medicine was as 'effective' as the Chinese cutlery and Taiwan made inner pants, he was trying to sell to drunken people in local pubs. "But come to think of it! Yeah, it may have been partly effective, because it forced me to consult a dentist at the first opportunity .... Anyway, that was my experience with Dr. Dawa! Or somebody. nkwame@gmail.com
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Updated:
January 07, 2006 . |
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Webmaster: WDJMallya |
